Should you take advantage of a free lap child flight or not?

One of the things I love about flying with children under 2 is that they are, in general, free (or gosh darn close to it)! This is especially great for newborns and young babies who will mostly want to be on mom—or dad—anyways and it’s also a real money saver, especially when taking an international flight. It’s a nice perk that makes traveling with young ones just a little bit easier.

But then there are the toddlers. (Shudder)

We recently traveled with our almost-two year old and just had a lap child ticket for her so that we could take advantage of the last few weeks of her “free” status. For three of our four flights, she did amazingly (she’s an old pro at flying). But that fourth flight? Yikes. She screamed, she wanted to run around and she most certainly did NOT want to be on my lap, especially when her older siblings had seats of their own. And she let the whole plane know it! I think we were both crying at one point.

So should you book that lap child ticket or suck it up and pay the cash for your child’s own seat? Read on for our general rule of thumb:

A “usually yes” for children under 12 months

While some children at this age are already very independent and mobile (and stable in their mobility), the vast majority are still young enough that sitting on mom or dad will be a positive experience. I’ve found that baby wearing on the plane at this age is especially helpful (I’m a fan of the Ergo and the Moby ring sling, but there are hundreds of options!) if allowed— some carriers do not allow baby wearing during takeoff and landing—and it also works well if you’re breastfeeding. Generally speaking, this age is a “usually yes”.

A “strong maybe” for children 13-18 months

By this point, most children are much more mobile and like to express their physical independence. At the same time, they’re usually still very emotionally attached to mom and/or dad (and some are still breastfeeding) while at the same time being easily distractible when frustrated or upset, especially with our favorite helpful plane items. You know your child best: will they want to be on top of you or will they want to be able to explore a little bit more, even if just at your feet? And is more space worth the cost of a plane ticket? For us, this age is a “strong maybe”.

A “probably not” for children 19-23 months

There’s a reason they call it the terrible 2s. Children at this age usually want to express their independence in ALL ways and have often been mobile for quite a while. They frequently have also developed more of their personalities and may have VERY STRONG FEELINGS about, well, everything. They’re also just physically bigger and harder to hold on your lap. At this point, it’s probably worth paying for that ticket and getting kiddo his or her own seat.

Travel with children- especially travel on a budget- is full of constant judgement calls. But you can use the general guidelines above to hopefully make travel with young ones pleasant…for everybody.