Traveling With An Anxious Child: Part 2
Have an anxious child? Here are 5 helpful tips our family uses for managing anxiety in children while traveling.
Last week, I explained how one of my children suffers from Generalized Anxiety Disorder, and how this necessitates an extra level of planning when taking a vacation. But once the planning is done and you are on-site, what happens then? There are 5 tips we have utilized in our travels that have truly helped manage my child’s anxiety when far from home.
Just Say Yes
Ok, not yes to everything, but make your anxious child as comfortable as possible in little ways. We used to be a no-screen travel family. (Yes, I bet a lot of you are rolling your eyes right now!) When my child started to express extreme anxiety about flying on airplanes last year, for the first time ever, my husband and I decided to make some changes. While long/international flights typically provide in-flight entertainment, we also wanted to be sure that there were familiar options for our child. We purchased tablets and it ended up being a great tool to have in our back pocket. There may be small changes you can say “yes” to that will go a long way in providing comfort in an otherwise anxious situation.
Acknowledge Feelings
Empathize with your child, reassure, and give them space to express their feelings. Children with anxiety can express these big feelings in any manner of ways, and it’s important as parents and caregivers to allow them to feel safe enough to let these feelings be known.
Give Some Autonomy
Some kids will find decision making to be paralyzing, others will find it helpful. For my child with anxiety, we allow strategic times for autonomy. Parents are in charge of the big picture, but we are fine handing over some smaller detail planning. This can look like, "Which gelato shop should we go to today?" or "Should we eat lunch before or after we visit that cool playground?" Of course with multiple children this can be tricky, but always look for ways to give a child with anxiety some level of control if/when possible.
See Their Perspective, Literally
Give them a camera! This helps to reorient children to be on the hunt for things that interest them at the new place. Instead of focusing on a fear, this can help a child to literally look for interesting things and help build memories at the same time. Incorporate these photos into discussions in your daily debrief.
Daily Debrief
A tradition we have as a family is to record our family’s highs and lows for each day of vacation. This is simply achieved over a dinner conversation or evening gelato. For your child(ren) with anxiety, probe a little deeper. What went well? What was an unexpected highlight? What caused big feelings? What made you feel uncomfortable? While you may not always be able to change things in your schedule, it is helpful to ascertain if there is any way you can adjust things to be more palatable for your anxious child.
We hope these tips are helpful for you and your family!
Disclosures:
1)We are not medical professionals or therapists. The suggestions made here are from a parent’s point of view for what we personally have found to be helpful.
2) This post contains affiliate links, which may earn us a small commission from purchases made (at no cost to you). Thanks!
Traveling With An Anxious Child: Part 1
Traveling with a child who suffers from anxiety? You aren’t alone, and you can have a successful trip!
One of my children suffers from GAD - Generalized Anxiety Disorder. What does this mean for traveling to new places? Well, to be honest, it can be complicated. Unfamiliar places, different cultural customs, and being off-schedule can be really triggering for my child and cause strong emotional responses. The following are things my husband and I have learned over the years to be helpful in preparation before a big trip!
Mental Prep
If your child has a therapist or some other outside support, schedule a session before (and after) travel if possible. This is a great way for a child with anxiety to work through some of those fears and anxious thoughts with a professional before you even leave.
Go Over Your Itinerary
Making sure your child with anxiety understands the basic flow of the trip is really important. For example, “Monday and Tuesday will be beach days, Wednesday and Thursday will be sightseeing days with more walking, and Friday will be a lot of driving to get to and from a historic site.” Whether or not you have WanderWell prepare an itinerary for you, we can also help you create a more visual guide for your child for them to better understand the method of your upcoming trip.
Visually Prepare For Your Destination(s)
Can I get a hallelujah for Google maps?! Sit down with your anxious child and walk him or her through the place you will be staying and visiting. I have found that this is such a helpful approach for kids (ok, grown ups too!) to explore and prepare for a new place.
When we did this before our trip to Croatia last summer, I let each of my kids “look” around our first stop (the city of Split) on Google maps. They loved being able to “see” our destination and “explore” parts of the city. Two of my children, including my anxious one, found an attraction they declared they HAD to visit - Froggyland. Was a museum of frog taxidermy on my Croatian itinerary? Absolutely not. Did I see how much excitement it brought to my kids, especially my anxious one? Completely. I kid you not, being excited to go to Froggyland gave my anxious child something to look forward to and I totally credit it with helping to diminish some of the worries before the trip. (And yes, we visited and it became a highlight for each of my 3 children. Who would’ve guessed?!)
Learn About Your Destination
Going to a new culture can be jarring for even seasoned travelers. For a kiddo who is naturally anxious? Even more fear-inducing. Before a trip to a new place, I try to pre-load my kids with age-appropriate materials so that they can understand where they will be before they arrive. This can be as simple as teaching a few new words in a different language (“Hello”, “please”, and “thank you” are at the top of our list!).
Preparing your kids can also include checking out some location-specific books from the library or even just watching YouTube videos about your location.
Ask your child in advance what he/she wants to know about the destination and go from there. “What do they eat for breakfast? What do kids do for fun? Do they dress differently? What sports do people like there?” Dispelling the mystery around a new place can help a child with anxiety feel much more comfortable once they arrive.
Don’t have the time or energy to gather materials? Contact us for help and we can put together a destination-specific times and traditions primer for your kiddos!
Stay tuned for part 2 of this blog next week for managing a child’s anxiety during the actual trip!